When I was a little girl, I always dreamt of becoming a writer, an artist or somebody who would work with world-changing matters, such as becoming a diplomat or that I would build orphanages and take care of less fortunate children.
I dreamt of this profoundly and for a while I thought I would at least become a poet since my days were spent in close attention, writing down words about life in a girly, pink book. As I turned 11 years old, my beliefs that I could not become any of those things that I dreamt of felt real. So, all of my dreams were “put” away, and I figured that I would never think of such silliness again since it was just dreams – unrealistic, if not even impossible to achieve, right? Shortly after this, I started wondering what the meaning of life was, and all of the sudden, I felt sort of…empty. From that day I became a person without dreams of the heart and a blindfolded search…for something.. started.
Years went by and I got my bachelor’s degree, occupied myself with lots of work, and more studies. Nothing just ever seemed to be enough, and I never seemed to be content with anything. How was it possible to do so much but never feel profound satisfaction? What did the feeling of hollowness want to say? In the end, I managed to camouflage that sense, let it be consciously or not – but I hid it well with even more plans, goals and projects, relationship(s) and the world with materialistic gratifications. I was hypnotically swept away by external rules while I tried to work harder, as I wanted more monetary achievement to get ultimately – freedom. At the onset of 2013, I decided to sell my business. I decided that I wanted to work with children, people all over the world; help in some way. I wanted to define myself according to something I did every day while driven by my creativity, compassion, and energy.
There are a lot of things that I would want to achieve, and I have many ideas – but let us start here with this brief story – so that you can get to know me a little better. Understand who I am and why I am doing this. I am not doing this because I am in a late 30-years crisis, and I am not doing this to find or fulfill myself. I am doing this because this has always been my dream and because I have found such a big part of myself and also, now I know what freedom means to me – to be free from one’s fear and mind, at the same time as you look at the world, at everything and the people around you with open eyes and an open heart. Not to be afraid of being yourself and feel everything that you feel and to live your life in the presence, as it was meant to be.
I want to share and maybe even inspire, so come along and follow me on my journey and become a part of it.